Why Is It So Hard To Have Honest Conversations About Sex?
[NPR, 3/18/19] To kick off NPR’s “Let’s Talk About Sex” series, NPR’s Ailsa Chang talks with two sex educators, Emily Nagoski and Dominick Quartuccio, about where people learn about sex and how that affects them.
AILSA CHANG, HOST:
We’re going to spend the next eight minutes on a topic you don’t hear a lot about on this program, sex – not sexual assault, not harassment, just sex and the role it plays in our lives, our relationships and society.
EMILY NAGOSKI: Sex is, first and foremost, a social behavior for humans. And how do we learn almost every other social behavior? By watching. We don’t do that with sex. The closest most of us come is watching porn. And learning about sex by watching porn is like learning how to drive by watching NASCAR.
CHANG: That is Emily Nagoski. She’s the author of a book on female sexuality called “Come As You Are.” We talked with her and another sex educator who’s focused on male sexuality about where we learn about sex and how that affects us. It’s all part of a series we’re doing called, Let’s Talk About Sex.
And just a quick warning, this is not intended for kids. We are going to be talking about sex, which means we’ll be using some words and phrases parents might not want them to hear. We started with Dominick Quartuccio, the founder of a sex education group called The Discerning Dick. He says his ideas about sex came down to three major influences.
DOMINICK QUARTUCCIO: My family, my faith and then my friends. And my family is an amazing, loving family, but we didn’t talk about sex at all. It was like, when – when there was a movie on television, it was simultaneously one of the best nights and also one of the most terrifying because anytime there was, like, a sex scene that started to unfold, my parents would lunge across the couch and be like, cover your eyes.
CHANG: Oh, God, yeah…….
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